Friday, i'm in love

I am so happy to bring back my feature "Friday, i'm in love" where i share with you some favourite things/shops/brands that i have discovered recently.

I am completely in love with this alphabet wall poster for Mia's room. She is starting to recognise letters now and i would love to get her this to hang up on her wall.

I have wanted to get a new watch for the longest time and i have found the most beautiful ring watches on The watch hut. I love love love this one. Elle is starting to learn to tell the time and i love this one for her first starter watch. It's pink, of course, but also has big numbers on the face to make it easier for her to work out the time.

We are hoping to get Elle a desk soon for her learning corner and i have been looking around for art work to hang up. I recently found this one via pinterest and i know it would look perfect in Elle's room.

I love washi tape and recently came across some really beautiful encyclopedia ones i would love. I completely love this woodland animal one, these botanical ones and this beautiful bird one. They would be perfect to tape up the girls picked flowers.

We have been looking into redecorating our living room and i have picked out this botanical style wall paper. We are having it on one feature wall and i just cannot wait to get it up on the wall!

Now the summer is coming up, i would love to get the girls this rollergirl swimsuit! It's just different from the high street shop swimsuits and i know they will love it too!

I hope you all have a lovely Easter!!!

This post is in association with The watch hut.

Lately

This month has been a busy one! First off, Mia has completely toilet trained herself. She turned three two weeks ago and in the last week, has gone from nappies straight onto the toilet, completely bypassing the potty and pull up stage! I am so proud of her and everytime she goes to the toilet, she shouts " i did it!" at the top of her voice for everyone to clap her!

Elle is on her easter holidays and it has been lovely having her at home. We have been out every day on a new adventure and have been doing some easter crafts. I cannot wait to share with you the birds nests we made this week! We have a week and a half left and this week we have a picnic planned, making a teepee in the meadow and spending time with family for Easter. The lilac is blooming in the garden and i have a lilac crown planned this week also. I also want to go back to the rape seed meadow for a self portrait shoot or maybe something with Elle. I have to do some more planning but i am looking forward to it.

I have put Mia's preschool application in for her two start two full days from September in the little preschool attached to Elle's school. I have having days where i am thinking "wow, two whole days to myself to concentrate on my photography" and then i am also having days where i think "noooooooo, she is too tiny and needs to be at home with me!". I felt the same with Elle and she ended up loving preschool. I know Mia will love it and from next September, she will be at school five times a week so i best get used it to really!

I am so happy Easter is nearly here. I have the weekend planned with my family. I am sad as my husband is away working in Scotland over the Easter weekend, but we will have a family day together when he gets back and make is special. I then have a dear friend visiting next week to see the girls so that will be lovely too :)

We have spied bluebells, which are our favourites, so next week we shall be going to our special bluebell woods for a picnic!!! I am overally excited by this :)

We have started making parts of the twig fairy house we have wanted to make all year. I am excited to share little bits with you as we make.

Let's have an adventure linkup VII

Our adventure this week was to go to the meadows and river to collect some little bits and pieces to make our very own birds nest. We collected dried grass from the marshlands and Elle collected a few flowers to decorate the nest with. I gathered some dry cut grass and some bull rush heads to put inside the nest. During the week, we dyed some eggs to sit inside the nest and then we will take it to the meadow to leave for nesting birds to use. 

"let's have an adventure" is a bi-monthly link up posted on the 13th and 26th of each month. You can share old or new adventure posts with us. We would love to have you join us and help us create this wonderful community of fellow adventurer's!!!!

<div align="center"> <a href="http://i58.photobucket.com/albums/g278/toffeeappledays/linkupgraphic_zps33ec2f77.jpg" title="gingerlillytea" target="_blank"><img src="http://www.gingerlillytea.com" alt="gingerlillytea" style="border:none;" /></a></div>

Today, we have the lovely Anna from In the Playroom co-hosting with us. She is sharing her own adventure on her blog so make sure you visit her!

An InLinkz Link-up

Siblings {april}

April is here and the year is going so so quickly! Elle is on her two week Easter holidays and it is so wonderful to have her home. The girls are spending most of their time playing "frozen" and i can hear them arguing over who is Elsa and who is Anna. They act out all the scenes together and it is the sweetest thing. 

A few weeks ago, i went for a drive in the countryside and discovered an amazing little road track through a huge rape seed oil meadow. They hadn't quite bloomed yet so this week, i decided to go and see if they had and as we drove through the village next to it, i could see it and my heart started racing! It was the most beautiful sight. We pulled up on the side of the road and i let the girls run into the field. Both girls picked a bunch each and they have now put them in jars in their rooms. 

Mia is still not that into having her photograph taken. I remember Elle going through the same stage, so it was quite tricky to snap some of them together. She is far too busy exploring and skipping along where as Elle will just stay in one place, admiring the flowers and choosing which ones to pick for her bouquet. 

"Siblings" is a monthly link up where myself and 9 other bloggers all share a photo of their children and then we each send you off to look at another blog. You can then go around in a circle, viewing all of the wonderful photographs and then why not link up yourself if you have two  children or more! This month, i am sending you over to Kelle's blog. Her blog is full of the most wonderful photography and her two sweet little ones! A must read!

<div align="center"> <a href="http://www.dearbeautifulboy.com/2014/04/siblings-april.html" title="dear beautiful" target="_blank"><img src="http://i291.photobucket.com/albums/ll320/looby_boo/siblingslogo-200_zpsa514149f.jpg" alt="dear beautiful" style="border:none;" /></a></div>

Spring wishlist

I am a dress lover. You will always find me in dresses and until a few months ago, when my husband bought me some skinny jeans for the school run, i didn't even own any trousers. Of course, i wear the jeans under my dresses. Not only am i a dress lover, but i am an adventure lover and my poor cream winter tailored coat has turned a slight shade of "beige".

I have struggled in the past to find a coat that compliments my style. I own one coat and then as the weather warms up, and i get too warm in my winter coat, i tend to wear chunky knit cardigans and end up being cold. Finding a coat that is practical, stylish and that i can wear over my dresses for the spring months seems an impossible task but i have recently come across the beautiful women's tweed blazers at Joules.com. They are timeless, classic and suit any style. I defiantly have one on my wishlist for this spring. On my list is also a few more lace dresses, some vintage brogues and many more flower crowns. What would be on your spring wish list?

(This post is in collaboration with Joules. All opinions are my own)

Being creative and being a mother

Yesterday, i was on instagram, just looking through the accounts i follow and i suddenly had a huge wave of self doubt come over me. It really consumed me and took me back a bit. I had to log out and put my phone away for the rest of the night and this morning it really bothered me. I took Mia to play group and on the way home, i was basically talking out loud to myself about what was floating around in my head and ended up doing a little voice memo on my phone so i could try and figure out why i felt that way.

I am such a big people pleaser. I hate letting people down or the thought that someone might not like me. I get super anxious about it all the time. My instagram account started as a photography account mainly where i shared my latest creative photographs. I gained a lot of followers and it always made my day when someone said i inspired them. I battled for a while to upload photographs of the girls on that account so i set up a second account for more candid photos. I gradually started to add photographs of the girls onto my main account and over the last few months, it has become more of an account for creative photographs of my girls. I have since lost hundreds and hundreds of followers and my likes have more than halved. It didn't really bother me and it shouldn't really at all as it's just an app and i don't take photographs for others and i don't ever want to get into that hole where i take photographs just for others and what i think they might like. But i cannot help feeling that i have lost who i was or lost who i am inside. Having two children can make it really difficult to be creative and take that time out to be myself. I have a demanding three year old and a five year old who needs my help with school work and who is so inquisitive and curious about everything. I feel so guilty if i try to do photographs for myself or sit and craft something as i am not giving these two little girls my everything. I guess it makes me feel a little sad that i am struggling to find the balance between being a mother and being a creative person. I am an all or nothing type of person and i cannot give myself to either without neglecting the other.

I look back through my flickr and instagram feed often. I see the thousands of likes and the photographs i took and wish i could take again. I write ideas in my notepad of new shoots i want to try and new things i want to craft but then i have a little girl in front of me asking for some lunch or to play a game with her and i put the notepad away and push my creative thoughts away and lie down on the floor and pretend i am a dinosaur on a train track, blocking the trains from getting to the next station. I see the comments about how i have inspired someone or how someone could live my life and i feel like i have let them down. Not that i know them personally but that i don't have that life that they think i do. I am a normal mum that has a messy house and a pile of laundry to fold and put away and dishes in the sink. I wouldn't change my life now for anything but i often wonder how these other mums do it. They must be some kind of superwomen as i struggle everyday and the feeling of guilt is immense. For both sides. For the side that i want my daughter to nap so i can bake or read or blog or even nap myself and for the side where i just haven't taken a creative photograph in weeks because i am too busy dealing with potty training and with phonics. Where is the middle ground and how on earth do you find it?

My instagram feed will not change and i will not allow myself to photograph for others. I am creative and i like to catch creative moments in my photographs. That will never change and that is truly who i am and truly what my children do. I never pose them or make them do something just for a photograph. I capture moments of their childhoods but in my own little creative way. And i won't worry that i loose 20 followers if i put a photograph of up my children. This is a change and it is a good change. It is where i am in my life right now. In ten years time, they won't want their photographs taken and i will have more time for my own personal work.

I won't let an app make me feel like i am not a good enough mother or good enough photographer, ever. I am me and i am doing the best i can. My juggling may seem way off balance but i am going through a journey and to be able to document this journey and allow people in to follow this journey with me is a pretty wonderful thing i think.