Meet Rusty. He is a springer spaniel and we rehomed him a few months ago. At the time, i wasn't 100% on getting a dog. My husband and girls really wanted one so i hoped that if we got one, my mind would be changed. We found Rusty and my husband went to pick him up. As soon as he came back with him, i felt so overwhelmed and didn't really know what to do. Instead of that instant urge to cuddle him and fuss him, i just fought back the tears and took myself upstairs to bed. The next few days, i just didn't know what to do. My husband knew i was upset but i felt so guilty and ashamed that i felt that way and really didn't want to. I sat down and tried to work out why i felt like this. I came up with a few thoughts and sat down and talked it through with my husband.
The truth is, i have a problem with control. I admit now that i have had a problem with eating disorders since i was 11. I get bad anxiety when i don't feel in control of a situation but i have learnt how i work and what i need to do and work hard to keep a little control and routine in my everyday life and i seem to be able to keep it all under control most of the time. Elle had just started school and our best friends, who were also our neighbours, had just moved to the other side of the world. I had spent days and days blitzing my house and had finally just gotten into a routine with the school run where i felt ok and i was so happy with how things were going. And then this huge dog bounced into my living room and i just choked and couldn't get to grips with such a sudden change. I spoke with my husband and we decided that we would rehome Rusty but, secretly, i wanted to keep him and get over my anxiety about the situation. I think Rusty knew i was feeling funny towards him and he would look at me with huge sad eyes and would snuggle with me in bed when Gilles worked in the evening. We started to have a bond and he actually started to help me get over my anxiety. So here we are now. He is very much "my" dog. He follows me around and listens to me more than my husband. I feel so awful with how i felt towards him but it was never ever about "him". It was the sudden change and upheaval that i struggled with. I wanted to share my story in case it helps anyone else feeling similar.
We love our dog walks and he is such a water dog. I can see Rusty coming on many of our adventures with us! So now it is your turn to link up! We want to see your adventures!!!